Day Three

Today I am thankful for my career I have and for the countless number of children (and parents, both biological and foster/adoptive) who have had an impact on my life.  Though I am the one who is supposed to teach and help them, it is often the case that they teach and help me in even greater ways.

I was at dinner with a friend tonight (someone who is also a blessing in my life).  She had her daughter with her, a little girl who was in the foster care system, someone who could have been my client, someone who has in her short life experienced more loss than I can imagine.  Yet I watched as she sat across from us at the table eating her hamburger and making mountains (or something else in her imagination) out of her french fries, and she was happy, truly full of joy.  I am sure there are times when she feels confused and sad, but today she was perfectly content, smiling and singing as her mom and I talked.  She was more patient than I am when waiting for someone to finish a conversation so I can move on to my next activity.

Every day I am faced with children who have been abused and neglected.  Some of them do not cope as well, and some of them do not have the happy adoption ending, but each of them has something to teach the rest of us about life and love and survival.  I could tell story after story, but changing names and other identifying information wears me out when I am writing.  I have learned from them how to appreciate the trials I have gone through.  None of mine compare to theirs.

James 1:27 says, "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world."  I have had the opportunity and privilege to do that for the past 19 years.  To me these two concepts:  looking after orphans and widows" and "keeping oneself from being polluted by the world" match each other perfectly.  In my personal experience, looking after orphans has caused me to have to seek God more, which protects me from the other.  In addition, I see what the pollution can do to a person's life and how big of an impact it has on those around the polluted person.  It's heartbreaking.

I remember my first case ever, and I wanted to mention that I learned a lot from the birth parents of the child, too.  I carried it from prevention to adoption.  I saw the heartbreak of the parents, who I believe were doing the best they could, but generations of "pollution" had damaged them to the point that they could not provide for their child.  I used to wish that I could take both the mother and child home with me.  I remember gathering the parents' psychosocial history and thinking, "No wonder."  They needed healthy parents as much as their child did.  Things are not always as they might appear.  It was eye opening.

I am thankful for what God has taught me and how God has molded me through the many people I have been able to serve over the years.  What a blessing!